Affective presence
Affective presence
Affective Presence: Beyond Emotional Intelligence
The term "affective presence" was coined by psychologists Noah Eisenkraft and Hillary Anger Elfenbein in 2010. It refers to the overall, lasting effect individuals leave on others by simply being around them, regardless of their own emotions or intentions. It is attributed to an individual's ability to manage and communicate emotions effectively, with expressive styles playing a significant role in determining whether one elicits a more positive or negative affect.
Emotional intelligence, as we are told, is about targeting an outcome - illustrated by books such as 'how to win friends and influence people'. Affective presence is about establishing connections.
Affective Presence: Beyond Emotional Intelligence
In the realm of interpersonal relationships and social dynamics, the concept of emotional intelligence has long been heralded as the key to understanding and managing emotions, both our own and those of others.
Now, what is affective presence?
Affective presence is a concept that transcends the tactical aspects of emotional intelligence. It’s not about manipulating emotions to achieve a desired outcome or to gain favour. Instead, it’s about the emotional footprint one leaves on others, the atmosphere one creates, and the feelings one evokes in interpersonal interactions. It’s the genuine and authentic connection that forms when we are truly present with another, unburdened by agendas or expectations.
Unlike emotional intelligence, which often targets specific outcomes and responses, affective presence is about establishing a sincere connection, creating a space where emotions are acknowledged, respected, and shared. It’s about being attuned to one’s own emotions and those of others, fostering an environment of mutual understanding and shared experiences.
The Essence of Connection
Affective presence is the embodiment of true connection. It’s the warmth that fills the room when someone with a positive affective presence enters. It’s the comfort and ease felt in the company of someone who is genuinely present, the unspoken understanding and the shared laughter. It’s not about ‘winning’ friends but about being a friend, about being human together.
It’s not about ‘winning’ friends but about being a friend
In a world where strategies and outcomes often overshadow genuine connections, affective presence reminds us of the importance of being rather than doing. It’s a reminder that our worth is not measured by the number of friends we have or the influence we wield, but by the quality of our connections and the depth of our relationships.
We walk around armoured with our egos
We all traverse through life, often armoured with our egos, don’t we? It’s like we are in this constant battle to protect our vulnerabilities, to shield our weakness, shield our true selves.
But here’s the essence of affective presence—it’s about allowing ourselves to lower that armour, to be vulnerable, to establish a connection that is raw and unfiltered.
Affective presence is the unseen thread in our everyday interactions, be it as a family member, a team leader, or a citizen. It’s about being genuinely present, allowing a shared vulnerability to create authentic connections and mutual respect.
For team leaders, it’s the cornerstone for fostering cohesive teams where individuals feel valued and understood, enhancing collaboration and trust within professional settings.
As citizens, it’s our resonance in our communities, fostering inclusive dialogues and a shared sense of humanity, acting as a catalyst for positive change.
In essence, it’s about shedding the ego, embracing authentic connections, and enriching our lives and those around us through shared experiences and empathy, creating a world filled with meaning and purpose.
Such an interesting read and i am happy to understand how effective presence truly is and how i must live in the presence of others. I like the phrase "The goal is not to make friends but to be a friend". You are a wonderful thinker.